The Gasoline Hypocrisy

Gas is expensive. No shit. We all see it driving down the highway; we all feel it paying at the pump; we all complain incessantly about it whenever we damn well please. It sucks, and it sucks worse that high gas prices are likely here to stay.

But... what are we doing about it? Complaining? Yes, we've already established that. Berate ExxonMobil and the other large petroleum companies? Oh, yes... damn their profits. Damn them. Never mind that they are companies and they exist solely to turn a profit. Fuck it. They're easy targets. Still, what the hell are we doing about it?

Have any of us started new carpools to get to work and back? Have any of us started planning shopping trips with our friends and neighbors in order to save that precious gas and cut down on congestion? Have any of us jumped into the world that is public transportation?

Short answer: no, no we have not.

Oh, we'll complain. Oh, we'll adjust our spending to buy fewer DVDs and more generic groceries in order to accomodate our growing fuel costs. But, no... we'll be damned if we give up our personal rides in order to look like the dork riding in his friend's passenger seat. Appearances and status are everything, and, fuck me, it's worth $4 per gallon.

And besides, the growing clamor of so-called "worldy" people pointing out the fact that Europe and Asia spend WAY more on gasoline than we do is somehow causing us to justify putting up with expensive fuel. Call it the frog in the pan trick.

We're idiots. All we do is complain and do nothing to alleviate the problem. Buy a Prius? For what? About 45 to 50 miles per gallon? Shit, a Geo Metro did better than that, and that was 15 years ago.

No, we have at our fingertips a multitude of ways to help ourselves, but we won't do it. Hell, we could force high school kids to take the school bus. How much gas would that save? Probably not an insignificant amount.

Anyway, before I start to ramble too badly, I need to wrap it up. Basically, change your driving/riding habits or shut the fuck up and pay the $4.

We're all just whiny-ass hypocrites.

White Supremacists Must Be Boring

Like a lot of people, I read about those white supremacist twins in the last couple of days... you know, the ones who have that Neo-Nazi band that promotes "white purity." The irony of these twins is two-fold. First, their music absolutely sucks. I'm not saying that just because I'm a minority and I hate racists... I'm saying that because their music absolutely sucks. Second, is that the twins are quite cute, and could theoretically be the next Mary Kate & Ashley jailbait countdown if they weren't so, well, stupid.

Anyway, all this shit got me to thinking... White supremacists must be really boring people.

Think about it... they probably don't watch a lot of sports, given the proliferation of non-white athletes. Major League Baseball? Nope. Major League Soccer? Haha... no. National Football League and National Basketball Association? Oh, fuck no. Even honkey-stalwart sports institutions such as the National Hockey League and the Professional Golf Association have been "infiltrated" by >gasp< people of color. I guess that leaves NASCAR... but isn't there a black driver working his way up the Busch Series now? Uh oh.

We've already established how shitty their music is... but lets check off the other arts. Movies? No... Sydney Poitier ruined film for the Aryans years ago... and Will Smith isn't helping them out at all. I guess when the KKK decide to make a short film, they go to the movies, but that doesn't seem very often. Television? No. In fact, are they even allowed to watch television? Since 100% of color TVs in America are foreign made? Can't be supporting those zipperhead Japs and Kim-Chee Koreans now, can they?

While we're on that subject... what do they drive? Ford and Chevrolet are inundated by foreign parts and design influences, so I'm assuming they're out. Do they drive Chryslers? I guess they would, since the Germans own them now.

Do they have cell phones? I'm trying to imagine the Grand Dragon of the KKK calling the head of the Aryan Nation on his Samsung or Nokia camera phone. What about stereos? Seriously... is it against their beliefs to buy non-white made products? Should white supremacists just devolve into a quasi-Amish society? Maybe they'd breed themselves out that way.

Are they allowed to eat oranges since orange groves are largely tended by Mexican workers? Can they eat the foods that have Jewish blessings indicated on them? I guess they have to grow their own food, eh?

Do they even read? I mean, the Chinese developed the art of print, you know. Can they even surf the Internet with their Dell computers with Korean or Malaysian-produced motherboards?

I guess my theory must be sound. White supremacists aren't just ignorantly stupid, they're also stupidly boring.