White Supremacists Must Be Boring

Like a lot of people, I read about those white supremacist twins in the last couple of days... you know, the ones who have that Neo-Nazi band that promotes "white purity." The irony of these twins is two-fold. First, their music absolutely sucks. I'm not saying that just because I'm a minority and I hate racists... I'm saying that because their music absolutely sucks. Second, is that the twins are quite cute, and could theoretically be the next Mary Kate & Ashley jailbait countdown if they weren't so, well, stupid.

Anyway, all this shit got me to thinking... White supremacists must be really boring people.

Think about it... they probably don't watch a lot of sports, given the proliferation of non-white athletes. Major League Baseball? Nope. Major League Soccer? Haha... no. National Football League and National Basketball Association? Oh, fuck no. Even honkey-stalwart sports institutions such as the National Hockey League and the Professional Golf Association have been "infiltrated" by >gasp< people of color. I guess that leaves NASCAR... but isn't there a black driver working his way up the Busch Series now? Uh oh.

We've already established how shitty their music is... but lets check off the other arts. Movies? No... Sydney Poitier ruined film for the Aryans years ago... and Will Smith isn't helping them out at all. I guess when the KKK decide to make a short film, they go to the movies, but that doesn't seem very often. Television? No. In fact, are they even allowed to watch television? Since 100% of color TVs in America are foreign made? Can't be supporting those zipperhead Japs and Kim-Chee Koreans now, can they?

While we're on that subject... what do they drive? Ford and Chevrolet are inundated by foreign parts and design influences, so I'm assuming they're out. Do they drive Chryslers? I guess they would, since the Germans own them now.

Do they have cell phones? I'm trying to imagine the Grand Dragon of the KKK calling the head of the Aryan Nation on his Samsung or Nokia camera phone. What about stereos? Seriously... is it against their beliefs to buy non-white made products? Should white supremacists just devolve into a quasi-Amish society? Maybe they'd breed themselves out that way.

Are they allowed to eat oranges since orange groves are largely tended by Mexican workers? Can they eat the foods that have Jewish blessings indicated on them? I guess they have to grow their own food, eh?

Do they even read? I mean, the Chinese developed the art of print, you know. Can they even surf the Internet with their Dell computers with Korean or Malaysian-produced motherboards?

I guess my theory must be sound. White supremacists aren't just ignorantly stupid, they're also stupidly boring.