Art & Entertainment Musings

I'm so very bored, and we all know what that means... yes, yes... this is the week that all men prepare themselves for the football game of the year, and all women prepare themselves for its commercials (if that's not a stereotypically sexist statement, I don't know what is).

Katie Holmes has apparently been dropped from the Batman sequel. I think I just converted, because this is proof that there must be a higher power. She sucked in Batman Begins, and there's a shot in which she resembles Sloth from The Goonies. Good riddance.

Rachel McAdams is the rumored replacement for Holmes, by the way.

Chris Daughtry's album is selling well. He's a good guy, in my opinion, but he's also highly overrated. That throat-trill needs to go. There's no gimmick in music that gets older faster (except for five sorta hot British girls with stupid nicknames singing bad songs). Still, he gets kudos for that National Anthem rendition at the NFC Championship game.

There's a movie called Teeth that deals with the supposed male-oriented fear of "vagina dentata." It's supposed to be good, but I wouldn't know. I'm still in disbelief that somebody made this movie.

Some so-called "conservative family groups" are whining about Dakota Fanning's rape scene in her new movie, Hounddog. Um... why? If you can't handle such serious and realistic subject matter, put your blinders on and go watch a different movie.

Have you ever read a lot of bad poetry in a row? Have you ever read someone who writes poetry, but basically just writes the same poem over and over again, with different words? I have, and it made me sick. I've never wished illiteracy on anybody... until now.

The only thing worse than the aforementioned poet's poetry are his so-called song lyrics. Ugh.

The singer Brandy, who might be charged with involuntary manslaughter stemming from a death in a traffic accident, is now being sued by the dead woman's family for $50 million. You know, tragedy is tragedy, but Brandy hasn't even been found guilty yet. And I'm well aware that you can't really put a price tag on a life, but does anybody else think that this family is more concerned with "cash cow" than they are with mourning?

After a couple of years of wondering if Screech from Saved By the Bell was actually cool, it's been confirmed that, no, he's definitely an idiot.

Prison Break and 24 are off to fantastic starts in 2007. Heroes remains overrated and painfully derivative, yet somehow maintains my interest. Battlestar Galactica is officially a stinker. When the Hell does Lost start back up?

Smokin' Aces looks to be painfully painful. But the glutton in me just can't resist. Besides, after watching Lucky Number Slevin, I think I can handle another cheesy hit man movie.

Rage Against the Machine is supposedly reuniting temporarily to play at Coachella this year. Right on. I just hope this means that Audioslave isn't going anywhere.

Television hit Grey's Anatomy seems to be in a bit of a bind, doesn't it?

The best comic book series of the 21st Century, Warren Ellis' Planetary, is about to come to a close. Do yourselves a favor and pick up the trade paperbacks. Phenomenal stuff.

Coming full circle, there's a rumor that Katie Holmes might end up being the new Wonder Woman. I take back what I wrote earlier about a higher power.

Randomness on a Sunday Night

Well, the Bears beat the Saints and the Colts beat the Patriots today. I'm really glad the Patriots didn't win; not because they beat the Chargers last week, but because I know I would've gotten real sick of the press pushing the whole "Superbowl Rematch" angle. 1985, anybody?

They should relabel the press the "dead-horse-kickers."

People who write bad poetry need to be stopped. People who post their bad poetry online need to have their electricity turned off.

I found a new pastime to help accelerate the carpal tunnel syndrome that I know I will one day suffer from: Guitar Hero II. Damn you, PlayStation.

Does anybody remember that U2-esque song from the late 1980s, "Under the Milky Way," by the band The Church? Did anybody know that The Church is still an active band? Does anybody know that they absolutely rock? Of course not, you're all listening to Emo/Screamo crap.

Chris Daughtry of American Idol fame sang the National Anthem prior to the Bears-Saints game. He actually started crying. Good for him.

A 29-year-old posing as a 12-year-old tried to enroll in a school. He was living with two over-40 sex offenders. I don't know who got more sick over the situation, the school authorities when they discovered the age discrepancy, or the two sex offenders when they discovered they weren't having sex with a 12-year-old. And you all wonder why I call for Armageddon so often.

For those of you with HDTVs, please don't stretch the image if you don't have an HD tuner. Squat, fat characters on Prison Break and Grey's Anatomy do not make the shows better. Set the image to 4:3, and deal with the black bars on the sides. You're the same idiots who complained about watching movies in widescreen, despite actually seeing a "larger" image, and then complained about your full screen DVDs when you bought a widescreen televison. Yes, you are. Don't deny it.

David Beckham signed a contract for how much money to play soccer in the United States? Wait a second, they play soccer in the United States? Soy de los Estados Unidos! Why don't I know about these things?

Classy people don't go around advertising that they're classy. They just are. Modest people don't go around advertising that they're modest. They just are. Honorable people don't go around advertising that they're honorable. They just are.

I want to see Rocky Balboa and I'm not afraid to admit it.

Lindsay Lohan checked into rehab. And even though I liked Mean Girls, is there any chance that they could keep her there? That would, like, kick ass.

Professional photographers know how to light a shot. If you're letting a "professional" take pictures, and he or she isn't being anal about lighting, you're getting ripped off.

Apparently there's serious discussion that Leonardo DiCaprio is the best actor of his generation. Well, he's got my vote, although I'd throw up some other names into that debate.

Thank you, NFL Network, for airing the "Making the Squad" cheerleader documentaries against the playoff games. Switching to that sure beats watching commercials. And this was WITH Tivo. Cheerleaders rock, what can I say?

People on MySpace really need to check to see if they're "posting" bulletins. I'm very sick of my friends trying to sell me Playstations, penis enhancements, cheap vacations, and cheap women. For crying out loud, change your fucking password from time to time.

For those lucky enough to live near a Macaroni Grill, try their Italian Margarita. I'm not sure what the extra ingredient is that makes a margarita "Italian," but rest assured, I will find out and load my cupboards for some nice home consumption.

If Hillary Clinton somehow manages to win the Presidency, in 100 years, people will look back, see "Bush-Clinton-Bush-Clinton" on the list of Presidents, and realize that the 1990s and 2000s were a very confusing time for us.

I'm going to bed.

My Two Cents on Americal Idol

This is the first season of American Idol that I've watched. I caught bits and pieces of the last couple of shows from last season, but like a lot of Americans, I'm far more interested in watching the audition train wrecks (William Hung, anyone?) than I am the actual competition.

However, thanks to an overzealous girlfriend, an equally overzealous sister, and an accidental run-in with Bucky and Paris, I've been forced to watch this year's competition... and, unfortunately, have become a bit addicted (not 24 or Lost addicted, but close enough). And so, I've decided to jot down what I think of a few of the contestants and who I think should win.

The first of the two finalists is the seemingly genuine, all-around fun-loving guy with the gray hair, Taylor Hicks. He's got a niche (think Joe Cocker, or even Tom Petty), he's got talent, and he plays several instruments on top of it. Then there's Katharine McPhee, surprisingly attractive, "I want to be a sexy pop singer but I'm more suited for singing in musicals," and "oh, I'm also a snob from Hell." Based on those descriptions, take a wild guess on who I want to win.

Seriously, can McPhee be any more snobby? I'm just shocked that most of America doesn't see it. Yeah, Simon, Paula, and Randy can be hard to take seriously at times, but has there ever been ONE instance that McPhee DIDN'T roll her eyes when the judges were being critical? McPhee... you are NOT perfect, are NOWHERE near perfect, and can't sing ANYWHERE near perfect. Take their advice, shut up, improve. You're like that idiot who takes acting lessons, but thinks you're already Academy Award caliber. And what's worse, you shouldn't even be in the finals...

Hell, she shouldn't have even been in the final three. Taylor, Elliot Yamin, and Chris Daughtry should've been the final three. At least then we'd have three relatively humble people. Three who would truly appreciate being where they are, instead of (as music consultant Dennis O'Donnell put it) thinking "she deserves it."

That being said, she has at least attempted some variety. Elliot Yamin stayed predictably safe in his choices (read: they all sounded the same after about the third week) and Chris Daughtry, despite his apparent fanboy appeal, was clearly a one-trick pony (quit that stupid throat trill... enough already), albeit a one-trick pony with potential.

Anyway, I'm already bored with American Idol. Let's hope that Taylor wins and goes on to become successful, and let's hope that Katharine becomes less of a snob, or at least falls off the face of the planet.