It's the End of the World As We Know It

... and I feel fine.

So, Barack Obama will be the 44th President of the United States. Good for him, and good for everyone who voted for him. Did I? In a rare case of revealing my political cards: no. But neither did I vote for McCain. To be honest, I didn't vote... I tried to, but between forgetting where I'm registered (I found multiple voter registration cards), then figuring it out only to realize my truck isn't running, I, well... no excuses.

I wasn't going to vote for President this year, anyway. I did have a vote for my state's governor and senator, but whatever.

Anyway, Obama's going to be sworn in next January. He is going to try to "change" a helluva a lot of things. But, make no mistake, most of those changes don't stand a chance in Hades of happening. In fact, outside of his economic plan, I really doubt we'll see much real change at all. Ironically, it will be his own party that prevents it.

Seriously, hear me out. Right or wrong, Obama will be put under the most powerful microscope ever put on a President simply because he is black. As a result, he will have to run a near-perfect ship. And that means not only keeping the people who voted for him happy, but making as many of the people who didn't at least not unhappy. I do not envy that man and the tightrope he will be walking.

No, I'm not really worried for this country as far as the election goes. Not yet, anyway. Guns will not be outlawed, the wars in Afghanistan and Iraq will not come to sudden stops, and corporations will still run rampant.

I am, however, worried for this country as far as Obama's military and paramilitary ideas go. He wants to shrink DoD's budget. Bad idea. The way he wants to do it will unavoidably result in a smaller military. Bad idea. And I'm still rather concerned over the comments he made earlier this year regarding a gendarme of the United States. Ridiculously foolish idea.

He may be better for the economy, but he is not better for the security of this country.

But, he won. Fair and square. I anxiously await to see how he does his job, as, I'm sure, you do. Maybe he'll be a great President, maybe he'll suck. I figure he'll be at least fairly competent, but will not enter the history books as one of America's great Presidents such as Washington, Lincoln, and both Roosevelts. He will only enter the history books as being the one to break the race barrier in American politics. And, presidential effectiveness aside, that's a good thing.

Do your job, sir. That's all anyone can ask. Except, of course, for the wholly un-American people who will no doubt claim they want to leave this country now that Obama is President. Funny how those wholly un-American people who claimed they were going to leave under Bush are now shouting out that they're some sort of patriots. Bullshit... real American patriots tough out the times they hate as much as they enjoy the times the love, and that includes tolerating the leaders they don't much care for.

It is definitely the end of the world as we know it, and, yes, I feel just fine.

Post-Halloween Musings

Bleh... I'm going to muse for a bit.

The Chargers are 3-5. The only reason they're not 3-6 is because they just had a bye week. That disaster in London against the Saints was just that: a disaster. Although I'm happy for Drew Brees. I'm sure there's a statement about just desserts somewhere in there. Anyway, here's hoping that firing Ted Cottrell does the trick.

People are already threatening Barack Obama's life. Seriously, people, shut the fuck up. If he were a white liberal, nobody would be so vocal. But, he's not. He's black. If he wins, let him do his job. If he doesn't win, let him do his job. Criticize him all you want, but don't threaten his life. There's a place for that; it's called the fundamentalist Middle East. You don't like Obama, go live over there. Until then, it's his right to be a bleeding-heart liberal. Wannabe Barack assassins are fucking pricks. Not to mention idiots... and hypocrites.

By the way, I will never vote for a ticket that has Sarah Palin on it. Sorry, I just won't. I don't care if she's Clint Eastwood's running mate. I just can't do it. Nope. Just can't.

Of course, that might not matter, since I can't find my fucking voter registration card. No, wait... I just found an old one. Fuck me, I can't even remember where I'm registered to vote. I guess that's what one gets for living like a gypsy.

Is it just me, or has trick-or-treating gone the way of the dodo?

How does a wonderful show about an obscure method of time traveling, Journeyman, not survive network cuts when a not as wonderful (but still good) show about an obscure "time traveler," Life on Mars, gets greenlit? Weird.

Must see movies: Eastern Promises, Superbad, and the classic Sex, Lies, and Videotape.

English should be the preeminent language of the United States, but should not be the legal official language. We are far too diverse a country (and always have been, for all you immigrant-phobes) to limit ourselves to one language. In our short history, we've annexed areas in which Spanish, French, Hawaiian, Samoan, Chamorro, and Carolinian have all been natively or otherwise widely spoken. And that's not even getting into the various American Indian languages and dialects.

Professional athletes working in leagues that have had government-approved antitrust exemptions (such as the National Football League and Major League Baseball) should be held to the same employment considerations as government employees. In other words, the first time one of the players pisses hot for a federally illegal substance (not necessary a league illegal substance), they should be banned from the league as long as that league reaps the benefits of those antitrust exemptions. Same goes for athletes who are felons. Athletes working in leagues not benefiting from antitrust legislation would not be subjected to these standards, unless those leagues adopt those standards themselves.

Speaking of banning, MTV should be banned from developing any more reality TV shows. Okay, not really, but at least quit producing such torrid garbage.

I feel embarrassed for any society which produces a show of the likes of TMZ.

Science is better than religion. Show me one war started by a disagreement over scientific research. That's not stating that religion is bad, but intolerant religion is ridiculously stupid.

Did the dinosaurs believe in God, gods, or the afterlife?

World War II created the modern world. Yes, that's right. We, and everything we know, were borne of war.

I miss my old pets: Flash, Yuki, Mike, Taro, "kitty," Lancelot, Galahad, Guinevere, Gawain, Tristan, Merlin, Vivianne, Arthur, Isolde... and even Percival, Agravain, Cricket and Rabbit, the Sagremor Sisters, and any others I failed to remember in my late-night stupor.

All right... that's enough musing for now. 'Til next time.

Presidential Qualifications

Several groups of people often complain that the Constitutional requirement that a person be born a naturalized citizen of the United States is anachronistic and unnecessary. As a result, these groups advocate an Amendment to the Constitution lifting that requirement.

I tend to agree, but I'm also in favor of more requirements for the Office of the President. A lot more, in fact.

No, I'm not convoluted enough to think it'll ever happen, but here's what I'd like to see in a Presidential Qualification Amendment.

1) Lift the naturalized citizen requirement. However, add the requirements that a candidate must (at the time of their inauguration) be a US citizen for no less than 35 consecutive years, and cannot have held a foreign citizenship in the last 21 years.
2) A candidate must have a minimum of 3 years military service (active duty).
3) A candidate must have been in public office at the State or Federal level for a minimum of 4 years.
4) This one's a kicker: a candidate must have earned a PhD (preferably from a public university).

Yeah, these are a bit extreme, but why not? Since they already have to be 35 years old, they have plenty of time to obtain all of those prerequisites. Indeed, the youngest President-elect to date was JFK at 43-years old (Teddy was younger when he took over, but he wasn't elected until he was older).

Since the President holds the position of Commander-in-Chief of the US Armed Forces, the military requirement seems natural. Also, since most Presidents historically have met the public office criteria (with the notable exceptions of Washington, Taylor, Grant, Arthur, and Eisenhower - all generals in the Army), that also seems natural.

Sure, the PhD is admittedly a stretch, but wouldn't you want a President who is clearly highly educated?

Also, get rid of term limits. There are natural term limits to the Presidency; it's called an election every four years. If the man (or woman) is doing a good enough job that enough Americans approve and want that person to stay in office forever, then why not?

Getting rid of term limits would also allow former Presidents to serve as VPs, cabinet members, and other positions in the line-of-succession for the Presidency. I admit this would be a rarity (John Q. Adams is the only President I can think of who even bothered with public office after his term as President), but why eliminate the possibility? After all, these people are supposed to be our "best and brightest" (save the jokes, please).

Again, I hold no illusions that this would ever happen, but it would be nice, no?

A Vice Presidential Ballot

The way we pick a Vice President is the dumbest way one can think of. No, really. It's stupid. And not just because it's non-existent, but because it's stupid. Yes, I realize that makes little sense.

Look at who our VP candidates are at the moment:

1) Joe Biden, the "safe" white guy chosen primarily to alleviate the "fear" of older white voters who might have otherwise been scared off by a black nominee for President.
2) Sarah Palin, the token girl chosen primarily to "steal" Hillary-loyalists and to show the Democrats that the Republicans, too, can play a "minority" card.

As you can probably infer, I don't much care for either one of them. In fact, I really dislike both of them. So much so, I'm not voting for President this election. I was already unimpressed by either Presidential candidate (though I was leaning one way or the other), but now... well, let's just say the VP choices have turned me off to politics this election season.

Makes me long for the days in which the VP was simply the runner-up in the race for President.

No, really.

Of course, in today's political climate, such a method would almost undoubtedly result in our political system shooting itself in the foot. Deadlock, gridlock, and filibustering would not only become the absolute norm, passing a law would probably become so rare, we'd start having National Holidays when one did actually pass.

So I'm offering a simple solution:

Directly elect the Office of the Vice President.

We love to believe we live in a true democracy, no? Well, this would help the People maintain that illusion. It would also require specific individuals to declare themselves as VP candidates extremely early on, and provide a better opportunity for the public to research those individuals. Not only that, it would prevent Presidential candidates from picking a VP simply for "added demographics."

In short, America would not only get the President that it wants, it would get the Vice President that it wants, as well.

People Are Idiots

People are idiots. I state this because, well, it's true. For evidence, I point to the following:

1. Apparently many people believe that showing up for a single election and casting a single ballot for a single position (in this case, the President) will somehow change everything. Anyone with a real education and real political/government experience, however, can attest to the exact opposite.

2. Just as many people believe that using a turn signal requires that you look over your shoulder to see if you can change lanes, and then activating a turn signal. Um, no. The turn signal is not for the operator's benefit, it's for the operators of the other cars. Signal intent, see if it's safe, then do it. Not see if it's safe and then signal intent. If it's already safe, why the fuck would you need to signal anybody?

3. ExxonMobil exists for one reason and one reason only: to make money. They are not responsible to care about our energy woes, nor are they required to even give a shit. Don't get me wrong, they're still a bunch of assholes (evidenced by the fact that they do not intent to increase oil production AT ALL for the next couple of years or so), but the popular belief that whining about it is going to have some sort of alleviating effect has to go. Look elsewhere to solve the problem. Barking up a tree does nothing save make noise.

4. Quite a few believe that The Da Vinci Code is based on fact. It is not. Nor is Angels & Demons. Nor is anything Dan Brown has written. Still more people believe Dan Brown is an excellent writer. He's not. In fact, he's elementary hack. A shit writer with (admittedly) great plots.

5. The new movies of the Star Wars trilogy were horrible, horrible films. And, yet, they somehow made hundreds of millions of dollars. Hell, I could've proven the thesis of this posting with just this example.

6. So many people are buying into the Ethanol myth. Um... it's not much better for the environment than gasoline is (it's less efficient; therefore, we have to use more of it... and its exhaust is nearly as bad as gasoline) and it has the added effect of depleting food supplies. And everyone seems to wonder why the farmers are so pro-Ethanol. Hmm... BECAUSE THEIR PROFIT MARGINS JUST SHOT THREW THE FUCKING ROOF. See ExxonMobil explanation above.

I'd continue this, but I suddenly became very upset (from a completely unrelated cause).

Have a nice day... idiots.

Political Incorrectness that Is

I suppose in my last entry I should have put something to effect of "it's acceptable to call your girl friends bitches," or maybe not.

For those of you who follow the soap opera that is the Presidential campaign, you probably saw or heard of the woman who asked Senator John McCain "How do we beat the bitch?" She was, obviously, referencing Senatory Hillary Clinton.

Yes, it was funny in that sort of way. Yes, it was a legitimate political question (well, in essence). And, yes, it was entirely inappropriate and more of a slight to McCain's supporters than to Clinton herself.

For years now, people have been complaining about the American political system and how completely distasteful and unprofessional its campaigns have become. And now McCain, one of the more vocal proponents of taste and professionalism, has now been caught in his own net. Yeah, that's a broad statement, but you get the drift.

Regardless of whether Hillary Clinton is a bitch or not, regardless of whether she's Presidential material or not, such labels do not belong in the (public) realm of our national politics. The woman who asked that question, clearly a bitch herself, should be ashamed she asked it, and on camera no less. She must have thought she was "standing up" and "dishing a blow" for her world view in an honorable, noticeable sort of way. She got the noticeable part right. Perhaps she's just a jealous old hag, or a mindless bimbo married to a dictatorial man who forces his political opinions on her, or perhaps not. Either way, she's an idiot.

I'm not voting for Clinton, nor do I even like her, but she is a studied, worldly, and intelligent woman. She is also Senator McCain's peer and colleague. McCain, politics aside, should have stood up for that fact more forcibly than he did. And though it was "an excellent question" pertaining to the campaign race, he should not have acknowledged that in public. I understand he was caught off guard and scrambling for a response, but he is a politician, and politicians are supposed to be masters in situations like that.

Keep in mind, in a country where most of its eligible citizens don't "waste their time" to vote, that woman is of the type of people that does vote. Whether you like Clinton or not, McCain or not, this is who you're up against.

And I guarantee you that bitch will fill out a ballot.

Vote Eastwood. And keep the name-calling in the locker room.

Driving, Voting, and That Thing Called High School

To paraphrase George Carlin, think of how stupid the average person is, then realize that half of everybody is dumber than that.

What I'm about to propose is complicated, yet simple; controversial, yet obvious; educated, yet ignorant...

BEFORE ANY LUNATIC MORON OBTAINS THE RIGHT TO VOTE OR THE PRIVILEGE TO DRIVE, he or she should have to pass the simplest of intellectual obstacles: high school (or, as the more intelligent recognize it as: secondary education).

Think about it, there's absolutely no reason that 16-year-old Billy Bob and his cross-town nemesis, D-Bone and the Funk Mafia should be driving to school and raising my insurance rates and automobile taxes. High school education is FREE, so is transportation to said high school. Hey, moron... TAKE THE FUCKING BUS. Traffic's bad enough without you shitbags fucking up the roads.

Disclaimer: I realize there are exceptions to every situation, so before your dumbass attacks me with a "what about..." email, go masturbate and think about it first.

There's also absolutely no reason for an idiot who dropped out of high school to have the right to vote. I'm sorry, you're stupid and can't hack pre-Algebra, and I'm going to trust you to make the right decision in electing our next President? Yeah, right. I'm hoping that I don't have to explain this reasoning further, but I will anyway.

Example: So there I was, attending a fairly liberal college somehow located in a fairly conservative town. Not being of traditional undergraduate age, my political opinion tends to be somewhat different than the oh, so worldly 18-22 year-olds populating our post-secondary education institutions. And therein lies the problem... during the last Presidential election war (read: Kerry versus Bush battling for the title of biggest moron in office), I'm inundated with these freshmen, sophomores, juniors, and seniors, spouting liberal or conservative bullshit based on something their parents said or something they saw on television. In other words: uneducated opinions from uneducated people (I can call them uneducated... there's a reason they're attending college, isn't there?).

Ugh... and that's just the problem with people who HAVE graduated high school. Now, even I'm not naive enough to think the problem can be solved completely, but by eliminating those without high school diplomas (or GEDs, I'm flexible), maybe we can start eliminating those idiots who somehow wind up in office.

Interesting side note: the word "idiot" was originally used to describe those people who chose to remain ignorant to the outside world, specifically, those who didn't feel the need to involve themselves in government and vote. Strangely appropriate, no?

So, there you have it... no high school diploma = no driver's license and no voter's registration. What's wrong with that? And if you think that's a little harsh, just remember that there are those who think that having kids should be illegal without a high school diploma.