Sunday, June 7, 2009

Just Scream

Everyone goes through at least one moment in their lives in which they realize that they're screwed. Most of us go through several of these moments. They manifest themselves in different ways, of course, from feeling the bolt in your M4 lock open and realizing that you have no more fresh magazines to learning the hard way that your fuel gauge has been broken for the past 350 miles. Emotionally, you hit a wall. Most of the time that wall is easily torn down or broken through, but every now and again, the damn thing is made out of reinforced concrete, super glue, and braced with titanium latticework.

Sometimes, even, you see the wall coming from miles away. In normal circumstances, if you can see the wall, you can do anything and everything to avoid it or blow it to pieces long before you reach it.

But there's always that one time... that one time that your hands are tied to the steering wheel, your foot is stuck to the accelerator, and your rack & pinion is frozen in one direction: straight ahead. And there ain't shit you can do about it but scream.

This happened to me once, years ago, and it took a very long time to get back on my feet. Life, naturally, didn't make things easy. Deals fell through, friends died around the world, people once thought loyal turned out to be flakes. The list goes on. But, still... I came out of it and enjoyed a decent modicum of success and freedom in the aftermath.

Unfortunately, I just hit another wall. This one I saw coming ever since I hit the first one. How strange, then, that I didn't even have time to scream.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

That last paragraph is absolute, profound perfection.

Posted by Jessica Lynn on June 8, 2009 - Monday - 1:23 AM

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