Southland

It's about to happen again, I can feel it. Yet another of my favorite television shows is going to get canceled and disappear from my continually shrinking "to watch" list. Seriously, I get that one man's trash is another's treasure, but why do the truly great shows never seem to find an audience?

A few years ago it was The Black Donnellys. The year after that it was Journeyman. Next came Life. And now... probably the best of the bunch: Southland. Maybe it's just coincidence that all of these shows originally aired on the much-maligned NBC network, or maybe not. Brilliant shows all. Add to these the disappearance of ABC's Pushing Daisies and my prime time viewing enjoyment has been severely inhibited over the past few seasons.

For those unfamiliar, Southland is yet another cop show. This one, however, more closely resembles popular hospital dramas such as E.R. and Chicago Hope (and, I'll say it... Grey's Anatomy... pardon me while I clean the puke out of my mouth) in that it's an ensemble show. It follows in the footsteps of the great Hill Street Blues (which set the precedent for ensemble cop dramas) and the underrated High Incident.

But it's better than all of those. And it's only been on for 13 episodes.

Some history: the show premiered on NBC in the late Spring of 2009. Its first season ran only seven episodes, probably largely to the fact that NBC can't keep a non-Law & Order show on the air for much longer than that. So then NBC picks it up for 13-episode second season. But, largely due to the Jay Leno fiasco, NBC cancels the show for being "too dark" after six episodes have been filmed, but none aired.

Thanks, Jay.

Anyway, TNT buys the show in toto from NBC and re-airs the first season in a lead-up to the six episodes of the second. The final episode aired last week and now fans of Southland anxiously await TNT's verdict concerning renewal. The show did well, but not well enough to be a shoe-in. And here we are.

Seriously, this gritty look into the LAPD is the best ensemble cop show I've ever seen (and is definitely a candidate for best cop show, period). Extremely well-written, with realistic dialogue (heavy subjects are often casually dismissed, while frivolous topics often take up entire conversations), documentary-style camera work (though I'm tired of hand-held camera, the show's use of digital cameras lends to its tone), and character development that not only provides subplot, but pervades into the main plot.

I've no idea how realistic the portrayal of the show is (I've never been a cop), but it seems far more so than anything else... including that "gritty" (I use this word, but I do hate doing so) NYPD Blue. Maybe The Wire has it beat, but I've yet to watch all of that particular show. And, besides, HBO has a leg-up on everybody.

Still, I do hope TNT does fans of the show a favor and gives us a third season... or the rest of the second season. There are too many character threads left hanging, and I just have to know what happens. The show has done well enough to double TNT's ratings in its timeslot, and it (to the best of my interpretation) is not losing money for the network. So why not?

And besides... it made me fall in love with Regina King. Like... totally.

Bite the Dust and Push Some Daisies

Well, it's been officially announced: Pushing Daisies will not be renewed due to poor ratings.

America, seriously, what the fuck is wrong with you?

Pushing Daisies is, hands down, the best hour-long family show on network television. It's superbly written, consistently hilarious, beautifully conceived, expertly produced, and aesthetically wonderful. To put it more simply: it's fucking awesome.

I really don't get how you people (yes, you people) don't latch on to outstanding programs, but somehow watch crap Knight Rider enough to keep it on the air. And don't get me wrong, I love KITT, but this new version has got to go.

This will mark the third year in a row one of my "can't miss" shows gets whacked early. Last year was the fantastic Journeyman; the year before was the drastically underrated The Black Donnelly's. And while The Black Donnelly's managed an ending (despite it not being aired) worthy of a series finale, Journeyman left us with questions we will never see answered, and it's reported that Pushing Daisies will do the same.

I guess the problem with Pushing Daisies is that it was intelligent and unique. I'm sure if it were another entry in the CSI or Law & Order franchises, you monkeys would've been watching.

Lame.

How About That?

Scientists have just determined that the closest known living relative to the Tyrannosaurus Rex is the chicken. I'd plug in a "but what did they taste like" joke, but some asshole reporter who thinks he's more clever than me beat me to it.

The Duke lacrosse players have been proclaimed innocent and the charges have been dropped by the North Carolina Attorney General. Did anybody really find this as a surprise? I mean, to find a "victim" less credible would require listening to Imus on the radio. Oops... did I just write that? Hey, nappy-headed hos have feelings, too.

People are walking out of Robert Rodriguez and Quentin Tarantino's double feature, Grindhouse, supposedly because they're not realizing that it's a double feature. That, or Robert Rodriguez' entry is worse than anybody is admitting.

I got dumped for a psychopath who writes what is undeniably the worst poetry on the planet. Can you believe that? And his eyes don't even point the same direction. And he's a closet homosexual. Which is really odd... but at least it explains his blatantly homoerotic narcissism.

The Black Donnellys, arguably the best new show on television, got ditched by NBC due to low ratings, thereby once again proving the stupidity of the American audience. But, rejoice, for Survivor is still on the air, and Sanjaya is still irritating the fuck out of me on American Idol. Way to go, American public. Way to go.

The San Diego Padres are off to a good start. Lets just hope they don't succumb to a head coach (whoops, manager) who repeatedly chokes in the playoffs despite having regular season records to be envious of. Wait a sec... wrong team.

NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell suspended moronic Tennessee Titan Pacman Jones a full year for his moronic behavior stemming from the fact that he's a moron. And, presumably, because the pink ghost kept nabbing him before he could get to the bouncing cherries.

Recording artist Pink is apparently being censored for her controversial views concerning President George Bush. I think the bigger controversy lies in the fact that she most likely has no idea who the current President is. NBC, please get rid of her Sunday Night Football intro. Please. It's fucking painful.

Overuse of a cell phone and/or laptop can cause the following health problems: sore thumbs, acne and rashes, carpal tunnel syndrome, computer vision syndrome, addiction, lower sperm count. Now, honestly, doesn't that sound more like the symptoms that our closet gay, no-talent poet gets when he surfs the internet for naked Elton John photos? Seriously, doesn't it?

Women who are ovulating are discovered to prefer "manly" and "high-testosterone" men. Um, we needed a study to discover that?

The UN recently issued a report that we are, in fact, in a state of global warming. Why do I get the feeling that Dick Cheney still doesn't believe it? No, let me rephrase that: why do I get the feeling that Dick Cheney still doesn't give a shit?

How about that?