Monday, December 11, 2006

Aliens and UFOs

Last night I happened to wander outside and see a bright, blazing light over a ridgeline. Now, my first thought was that it was one of the three planets aligning, until I realized that it was twinkling. Soon after that, I realized that it was moving. And, very quickly after that, I realized that it was a jet airliner whose navigation light just happened to catch me at the right angle.

So... no UFO for me.

Which brings me to my point. I truly and whole-heartedly believe in life on other planets. I have to apologize to all you religious universal-centrists that think we're it, but this medium we Earthlings occupy is just too fucking big for us to be the only life in it.

That being said, I don't really believe that we've been visited by life from other planets just yet. I can't explain away all of the abduction stories (unless they're drug related), but I'm pretty certain I can explain away the "alien ship sightings."

Think about this... aliens flying UFOs would obviously be from cultures FAR more advanced than ours. I mean, shit, these little gray-skinned fuckers would be flying half-way across the galaxy just to mutilate cows and kidnap neurotic alcoholics after hours, right? So anyway... these intelligent aliens could probably figure out (rather quickly, I might add) that all "Earthling" aircraft have red lights on their right, green lights on their left, and navigation lights somewhere on the fuselage, right? Please tell me you agree with me so far, even if you don't agree with my conclusion... because if you don't, you scare me.

Okay... back to the point. So, these aliens are flying around like drunk idiots, getting seen by drunk idiots on the ground, and getting reported to drunk idiots who watch The X-Files and take the show a little too seriously. What follows is a bunch of crazy conspiracy theories, even more bad television documentaries, and the occasional good movie (albeit amid a plethora of crappy ones).

To avoid all of this, why wouldn't the aliens, these intelligent aliens, just mount lights on their spacecraft similar to the navigation lights on our aircraft? I mean, anybody from the ground who saw blinking red, blinking green, and a nav light would immediately chalk the fucking thing up as a regular aircraft... even if they hadn't seen that particular type of bird before, right? Oh, sure, there'd still be the occassional "Oh, fuck, E.T!" guy, but for the most part, sensible people would be like "Oh, look, flying plane."

I'm rambling... but you get my drift. If the aliens can't figure out how to fool us which such a simplistic technique, then I highly doubt those little bastards can figure out how to fly into New York City undetected, rip some poor lady out of her highrise apartment building, and fly off into the night sky without anyone asking serious questions.

I mean, right?


Anonymous said...

I blame the tabloids. If there wasn't a market that paid these idiots, there wouldn't be so many of them.

I think that for every person, drunk or otherwise who honestly thinks they saw a UFO, there are 1000 losers who say "hey, I can sell my story" and jump on the bandwagon.

Bandwagons are fun...the same mentality goes for lawsuits. One McDonalds overcooks something, one sicko priest gets exposed, there are a thousand other people "suddenly deciding to come forward with their story." Please.

Honestly, I don't know who to believe anymore. Sorry, this comment is becoming a blog unto itself...I'll stop here.

Posted by Geoffry on December 11, 2006 - Monday - 7:31 PM

Anonymous said...

UFOs are real. You think in this Big universe and there are plenty of others, we are alone.

I understand why you wouldnt want to believe in UFOs, because Darwins Evolution theory would be foolish which it is.

Posted by -> on December 12, 2006 - Tuesday - 5:15 PM

Anonymous said...

Looks like someone can't read. They have free classes for that now.

Posted by Jessica Lynn on December 16, 2006 - Saturday - 3:18 PM

Anonymous said...

Yeah, I'm still trying to figure out how anything in that post has anything to do with this blog...

Posted by JeffScape on December 16, 2006 - Saturday - 3:39 PM

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...